Date Your Spouse

May 13, 2008

By James Fields

“Sometimes I feel like a pastor’s widow,” Delores said.

I was a young pastor working six days a week from early morning until late evening. I rarely came home for lunch since I viewed lunch as a great time to visit with guys in my church. Appointment after appointment filled my day, and visitation consumed most of my evenings. It never dawned on me that my wife sometimes felt like a pastor’s widow.

When I realized how Delores felt about our relationship, we decided it was time to start dating — even though we had been married several years. We chose Friday evenings as our date night. I initiated no more appointments for Fridays and only accepted funerals, weddings and emergency situations.

Our weekly date added tremendous sparkle to our relationship. We loved one another, but the date night helped us become friends. We set all responsibilities aside for the sake of enjoying one another.

Date your spouse. Do fun things together. You dated before marriage — keep dating after marriage. Now that you are married, let nothing hinder you from arranging frequent dates with your loved one. Every date will be a celebration of your marriage.

“This is my lover, this my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem” (Song of Songs 5:16, NIV).

— James and Delores Fields are veteran Assemblies of God pastors and former missionaries. They founded Comfort and Encouragement Ministries in 1997.